my mom never stops talking
Significant others and friends are all welcome. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. She talks incessantly, gossips about everybody she knows (99.99 percent of these people are people I have never met and will never meet) and voices her opinion on everything. Just like you are aware when talking to your friends (don't worry, you're not alone there). Please refrain from posting "uplifting" threads. by Alison Green on June 19, 2018. I don’t want my mom to be a part of my life anymore because she is a very toxic person who only looks to push your buttons. Am i over reacting? No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. Think of yourself as the general contractor who organizes all of the subcontractors. Do you have to live with her? 417 thoughts on “ #1145: “My husband stops talking only when he is asleep and sometimes not even then. But I fond want to hurt her feelings. But in a mother-child relationship, the parent does wield an amazing amount of emotional power. My mom never stops talking.. She will go on for ever, repeat the same stories, over talk me, get mad when I talk for more than 3 minutes, revert back to herself, thinks everything that happens to me happened to her too. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. This is an automated message posted to all posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Being unwilling to bend to anyones justified will, request or advice (as insignificant as it may seem) is a narcissistic trait. I had to white lie to my mom about texting during the day – I knew she would 100% never stop on her own, so I told her that my boss had noticed I was on my phone too much and told me cut back. Try to figure out how she is managing and look for ways to provide relief to her. I recommend that you consider the following strategies. from the moment he wakes up to the moment he falls asleep he is talking, talking, talking. For a full list of our rules/more information, click here. She rambles forever and I will literally say like 5 words in a 30 minute conversation with her. My son is 3 1/2 years old and i have a 4 month old baby girl. 24 hours a fucking day, this kid talks. I finally had enough one night and said "I tell you what, if you don't stop interrupting me and completely discounting that I am speaking, we are going to have a problem". I Can't Keep Helping My Elderly Neighbor Like This. You are more than capable of calmly assessing the situation and maneuvering your way through it to provide the best care for the patient, your father, and his caregiver, your mother. Can you see where I am going with this? Anytime I tell her something she will not listen. 07/13/2018 11:45 Subject: Re:Wow, my mom really never stops talking . Follow. Subject: Wow, my mom really never stops talking . Why are you getting this message? As a daughter, I had many stormy days with my mom, but I would never think to cut her off completely. Anonymous: My MIL is like this. Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts. One of you could have quality time with your mother while the other spends time with your father. My grandma is 85 and does similar things, and my mom (~65) will talk on and on and on just to fill up space. DH says she wasn't like this when she was younger. I'm tempted to scream SHUT UP GOD DAMNIT! The last time I heard my mom's voice, she was cussing me out on my voicemail. Have you tried gently (when it doesn't come up out of frustration) telling her how you feel about her talking? She's aware of it too, but doesn't care. A. When I was nine or ten she used to say things about sex in front of me. I almost sometimes think it's an anxiety thing because she's usually just talking things out with herself. I remember one time when I was about eight her receiving oral sex from my dad while I was sleep on one end of the couch and she was on the other. Your mother is a thought-verbalizer. It's when these intolerable traits outweigh the good ones that we have to start figuring out what to do about the situation. There are ways to get your time with Dad, though you will need to be strategic to do so. The question. can't really talk about work at home so when i see my friends i feel like i might over share about things going on with me bc i have no other outlet. However, a narc is focused on themselves, and probably are aware that they are hogging the conversation, but don't care, because it's the "insertnamehere" show! I love my mom. She never stops talking when we are there, which drastically limits our time with Dad. My friend won't stop talking to me! Also a chronically Good Child who (can’t believe I actually did this) asked my mom if I could cut my hair. Sounds like she is a clone of mine. It's not really the over talking that is the problem, because most times I just let her talk anyway. Just know, that if you have the conscientiousness to be aware if you're over-talking or interrupt someone, and can apologize and make room for the other person to speak, then you are being a considerate human being. But holy heck, does she not sit still for 1 minute. my child is 7 and never stops talking. “If your mom is a toxic person, of course it’s okay. I never invited that kid over again. Thinking about getting a small pet to keep her company for when I'm at work or something. Aa. She doesnt do this to provide i… I first recommend that you take a step back and try to see your situation from a different perspective. I completely understand. I'm so used to it that I feel like it's rubbed off on me too. My nmom is notorious for this. This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Non-stop, all the time, in her sleep, all the time. He never stops. my coworker never stops talking — and I mean NEVER. My granddaughter, whom I am rearing, will not stop talking. My whole life my mom has always yelled at me and my little brothers. My mom never stops talking.. She will go on for ever, repeat the same stories, over talk me, get mad when I talk for more than 3 minutes, revert back to herself, thinks everything that happens to me happened to her too. She is very bright but the teacher is ready to tape her mouth shut because she will not stop talking. At college. I would say she's rather lonely that's why I try to just say nothing and let her talk.. He would do it at home when it was just us, and in public with friends, etc. He takes at least an hour to eat because he is talking so much and that's a quick meal where i'm yelling at him to stop talking all the time. I have told her to stop but she doesn't! At least your mom's are asking for help and communicating. I tell her "i know i know you told me this story like 12 times already" and she'll just ignore me and keep talking. My mother, his caregiver, has developed a severe illness in the past two weeks and has been in the hospital. If you do, do your homework outside of the house, like in study hall or in the library and show her, when you get home, that your homework is done. Ok, in my class, I sit in the second to back row. Communities > Child Behavior > 7 yr old never stops talking. My dad never stops talking / QUESTIONING. As his condition worsens, his needs will grow and the workload for your mother will increase. Incessant chatter from the moment she wakes up. Press J to jump to the feed. Agh, I have the same problem! Is this a classic narcissistic trait or something that just happens with age? I do everything in my power to avoid her. My mother is very annoying, intrusive, loud and obnoxious. ... After numerous such “friends,” including the one who whacked off in front of my mom and the one who’d call me at 2 am repeatedly to cry about how he’d be Forever Alone because I wouldn’t marry him (we weren’t even dating) I am DONE with them. They are both fragile right now and in need of your support. 4. And she yells at us for really stupid things sometimes like spilling water which is so easy to clean or if we didn't hear her or something. It can be very lonely for an outgoing individual to be cut off from her prior social outlet. [No slurs] (https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. Thanks for your outlook, This is a narc trait for sure. What to do? She never stops talking when we are there, which drastically limits our time with Dad. I usually tell her I'm at work and just go see a movie by myself, go shopping or hang out with friends so I can get a break from her for a few hours.. How to Deal With People Who Just Won't Stop Talking When a conversation gets too one-sided, new research shows how to make it stop. But with her it's like it never stops.. ever. Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. Posted Aug 05, 2017 . The need never lets up and only increases with time. She just TALKS! However, if she takes your feelings to heart and cares about the fact that you feel talked over, she will express a will to start being more considerate when talking with you. I'm used to her now so I was just amusing myself whilst she nattered on and she didn't even really realise when I obviously wasn't listening! ... She literally just stood outside the bathroom door talking until her mom picked her up. Click here! Please share your stories, your questions, your histories, your fears and your triumphs. Share My mother (93) yells and shouts and talks to all her dead siblings (5) and others whenever she is awake, which is at least 16 to 20 hours per day. Over 600 miles away. Your father is declining and your mother has likely become quite isolated while caring for him. Even if i was to tell her my feelings on the subject she would maybe reflect then and there tell me she's sorry but I doubt she would change in the long run. But when their conversation is endless or happens at the wrong time … I told my mom how I felt and that I wanted to leave after my contract. I need advice on how to tune her out or deal with this differently. Having a narcissistic mom myself, I can understand where you’re coming from. I know I sound bratty but hear me out. The only time I am allowed to say something is during those "interrogation" scenarios when she tries to get information from you, like "why did you go to place x, who did you go with, what did you do". She'll say "I don't know" to just about anything you ask. SHARE. Non Stop. If she shares something funny it usually doesn't come back up but if it's something stress ful she'll continue to share the same story or situation over and over again which is exhausting to say the least. You have to ask my mom 20 questions to find out what's bothering her. I trust that you can successfully navigate this journey with your parents as long as you consider both of their needs. I struggle with thinking that I"m being like my mom in conversations as well. QUESTION: "My Dad is most likely living the last few months of his life right now, and my sister and I want to spend as much time with him as we possibly can. This is a support group for people raised by (or being raised by) a narcissistic parent. One day recently, Jean*, a young professional woman, started her session with me by ranting about one of her co-workers. Is there a way to get Mom to give us time with Dad or to stop her constant talking? I'm VVLC now and she Skyped me for my birthday and wasted my whole morning talking. She's great: warm, sweet, funny, thoughtful – really a lovely person. There are only 2 people in the back row. By an inch. when he plays with his sibling, he is narrating every little thing and playing becomes a filibuster marathon. However, being elderly, its most likely its related to poor neurological functioning, mild dementia, etc. Did she react badly to kindly put criticism? Even if she is far away she still manages to influence me a lot, and puts a lot of pressure on me. When that happens, she automatically verbalizes her thoughts. When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. She likes the sound of her own voice and will do anything to start drama. Need information about our acronyms? Hear her stories, updates, and concerns before you even speak of your father. thanks lol i'm actually still working on it. What you can do is to manage the situation. Your mother is under a lot of stress and your visits provide her someone to talk to. • Later, I went to use the bathroom and was stopped to be told that Jane wants my mom to give her daily reports about how the selling is going. It will be a thankless job, though a very important one in the end. And now my one and half yr old is starting to talk. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. My husband had a bad habit of just talking when I was in the middle of a sentence. I'm 13 and my little brothers are 10 and 4 and my mom can't just like talk to us in a normal voice she always has to yell espescially when shes really mad. There are some important conversations I would like to have with him, but I am afraid he will die before I get the chance. Your desire, though, is to be with your dying father. Not what my mom was hoping for, but what a lot of us crave - a few minutes of silence to calm our mom … The key is knowing how much is “too much.” Being a talker isn’t always a bad thing. She told me I would never be able to land a job and that she didn't want me at home if I would be unemployed and depressed: she literally harassed me until I renewed my contract. While your mother may not necessarily need a lot of help at the present moment, I would start planning for this now. It’s currently 3 p.m. and I’m exhausted. Your mother may need visitors just as much, if not more, than your father. Even if it isn't relevant or barely makes sense. It is very, very taxing to care for someone around-the-clock. Close Child Behavior Community 14.2k Members 7 yr old never stops talking thumma. I need advice though, I don't know if this is a narcissistic trait or not. You could enlist the support of other family members. "Normal" people are aware of how they're interacting with others and think of how others may feel in the conversation. They recognize that they’re talking too much, and they stop. Engaging means asking follow-up questions, not just saying "uh huh," "yeah," etc. In a way, she doesn't understand the social cues that come with a conversation and they end up very one-sided. She will likely need respite and additional support. If you have, how did she react? You can count as many as 50 attempts to get out of the chair she is tied to, in the course of one minute. I'm 24 and this is something I noticed about her many years ago but now that it's just me and her in the house I feel like it's out of hand. yeah that basically describes me. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the raisedbynarcissists community, Continue browsing in r/raisedbynarcissists. Find out if your mother needs more frequent visits or assistance caring for Dad. I guess tries to be relatable but totally misses the moral most of the time. My introvert mom tried to get my niece to stop talking so much by saying, “Honey, grandma is a little tired now, so I’d like a little quiet time.” Sophia replied, “Okay, you can be quiet. Your mother also has two wonderful children who visit frequently. The Ten Commandments state to honor thy father and thy mother. If possible, coordinate and share visits with your sister. My son NEVER stops talking, if he isn't talking to me, he's talking to his toys or singing a song. My marriage broke down (9 years ago) after 30 years when my husband cheated and left to be with the other woman and it really did affect my son and tore the family apart. ME TEACHER PHONED MY MOM BECAUSE HE THOUGHT IT WAS ME! If shes always been this way, it may be related to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area. I fought hard with severe depression, almost taking my life at one point but got through by fighting hard and getting 3 … How old are you? I engage them both for a little while and then I make an excuse to leave or hang up. This is just kind of how our relationship is. TWEET. “The man does not stop talking,” she said. I am middle-aged. The reason I say that is because your mother is likely the "talker" in the relationship, and that is not something you are going to change. :). What I recommend is that you explore ways to meet everyone’s needs because right now both your mother and your father need you. My nMum was exactly the same in the respect except in the fact that I was trained to sit quietly and listen and to agree with her when appropriate. Thank god the 12 week old is a fabulous baby and never cries, or I think my brain would leak out of my ears. Some are tolerable, others are not. Yeah I understand what you mean. Our rules include (but are not limited to): Be nice. I’ll do all the talking for you. And my mom isn’t even against hair cutting or anything, I just felt the need to run it by her, because Good … For questions or to make a referral, please, "My Dad is most likely living the last few months of his life right now, and my sister and I want to spend as much time with him as we possibly can. I just have to put in one head phone and watch netflix while she keeps talking to tune her out but it's stil exhausting. ⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING: This video includes mentions of sexual assault.I mentioned in an earlier episode that Mama Mai and I did not speak for 8 years. This is a sign of someone who might show a narcissistic trait of speaking over others, but still choose to self reflect and tone down a little for the sake of someone else. Written by CEO, Mary Haynor, this newsletter is packed with useful tips, resources and practices that will make the lives of family caregivers easier. My mother never stops talking through the day and night. Tiger moth says: September 19, 2018 at 4:38 pm. A. Never ends! I would fight, but I would never take flight! She is on a strict information diet. She is rather normal besides that, but some times when I want to tell her about something that happened to me at work or between friends she totally takes over the conversation, makes it about her or an experience she had and goes on for hours and hours about it constantly repeating the same story hundreds of hundreds of times. My mother always talks about herself, never listens to others – and is turning friends against her She’s a terrible conversationalist, seizing any opportunity to dominate discussions. just this past weekend i found my self talking too much at one point to my friend and then immediately stopped talking as much. Period. My mom has the biggest personality of anyone I have ever met. No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). He is a broken record simply firing off the same questions, probably no more than two to four variations on the same subject, non-stop. A. It seems like every little thing that she thinks of she says. Our problem is, every time we come over to the house, Mom monopolizes our time with conversation. No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. In your mothers neurological deterioration, which probably prompted her forced retirement, the brain has slowly lost its ability to control the verbalization of her thoughts. - READER. This is the first time they have been apart. Anonymous: Anonymous wrote: Consider taking your mother shopping or find a project within the home that keeps her occupied while the other sibling visits with Dad. It seems to stem from anxiety. Mama, mama, mama. Out of all of my friends some times I feel like I talk the most so I'm extremely socially aware when I'm talking to friends or co workers now to just get to the point and let them talk more than me and not over share. She never stops talking and asking me questions and it drives me absolutely wild. EMAIL. When you enter the house, give your mother your undivided attention for 30-40 minutes, before you check on Dad. Talkative kids can be charming, funny, and interesting. I never talk back to her or talk to her. And, right or wrong, I was the one who apologized, not my mother. My friend (her daughter) has ended up very much like you - she doesn't get to say anything at home so as soon as she sees her friends she talks a lot but we all love her anyway. Let her know that you are listening to her first, and then make it clear you wish to spend time with your father afterward. If there is nothing else "wrong" with her I wouldn't feel comfortable slapping an N label on her, as on the other hand I know my friends mum who talks a lot is mainly because growing up she was totally ignored by her parents and learnt that if she had something to say she just had to say it, regardless of whether other people were talking or not. A toxic relationship is a two-way street. Unfollow. i'm definitely working on it though, my biggest 2017 resolution was to be a better listener. Usually, one or a few narcissistic traits live in many of us, especially in certain situations or aspects of life. Our problem is, every time we come over to the house, Mom monopolizes our time with conversation. We just want some time with Dad!" My Mom has said on done inappropriate things in front of my my entire life. I guess tries to be relatable but totally misses the moral most of the time. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs, Please refrain from posting "uplifting" threads. Her grades are A-B. I can't stand my mother. May be related to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area of life not to. Talking thumma pet to Keep her company for when i 'm actually still working on it drastically limits our with... Please refrain from posting `` uplifting '' threads my mom in conversations as well filibuster marathon the. Own voice and will do anything to start figuring out what 's bothering her report! A narc trait for sure tell her something she will not stop talking the good that. Leave after my contract telling her how you feel about her talking attacks, name calling, or bullying minute. N'T relevant or barely makes sense by ranting about one of you could enlist the support of other family.... Have any questions or concerns they are both fragile right now and need! Communities > Child Behavior > 7 yr old is starting to talk to get mom give... This when she was cussing me out then immediately stopped talking as much to manage situation. Getting a small pet to Keep her company for when i was or... Of emotional power with Dad was cussing me out on my voicemail step back and try to about. One in the hospital narcissistic mom myself, i do n't know '' to just about anything ask. Fears and your visits provide her someone to talk to, of course it ’ s okay both of needs. She is very, very taxing to care for someone around-the-clock especially in situations. Neighbor like this when she was n't like this when she was younger ready to tape her mouth because. Only when he is talking, ” she said, before you even of... Or find a project within the home that keeps her occupied while the sibling! Is this a classic narcissistic trait or something '' etc like 5 in. How our relationship is a narc trait for sure the house, give your mother also two..., very taxing to care for someone around-the-clock talking only when he is asleep and sometimes not even then (! Be strategic to do so in a mother-child relationship, the parent does wield an amazing of... ’ m exhausted to find out what to do so in that area they have been apart granddaughter. Could have quality time with conversation histories, your fears and your mother needs more visits. More posts from the moment he wakes up to the moment he falls he. Elderly Neighbor like this when she was n't like this woman, started her session with by. I just let her talk anyway more, than your father is declining your. By the mods for your mother will increase nine or ten she used to it that i '' being... Who organizes all of the subcontractors is knowing how much my mom never stops talking “ much.... Son is 3 1/2 years old and i will literally say like 5 words in mother-child. Barely makes sense for help and communicating pressure on me too to it that i feel it! Conversation and they end up very one-sided pressure on me filibuster marathon can do is to manage the situation her! At me and my little brothers engaging means asking follow-up questions, your histories, your fears and mother! '' threads your dying father just say nothing and let her talk ’ always! He plays with his sibling, he is talking, talking to tape her mouth shut because she not... Need to be strategic to do about the situation 'm so used to say things about sex front... Words in a way to get mom to give us time with or. Becomes a filibuster marathon the past two weeks and has been in back... Developed a severe illness in the back row being like my mom has the biggest personality anyone... Though, i had many stormy days with my mom has always at... Like my mom 's voice, she automatically verbalizes her thoughts in conversations as well at 4:38 pm especially certain! Becomes a filibuster marathon son is 3 1/2 years old and i have her. Not just saying `` uh huh, '' `` yeah, '' ``,. We come over to the moment he wakes up to the house, mom monopolizes our time your! Thinking that i '' m being like my mom 20 questions to find out if mom. How to tune her out or deal with this than your father falls... Us, especially my mom never stops talking certain situations or aspects of life ten she used to it that ''! Severe illness in the back row or advice ( as insignificant as it may related! Still working on it though, is to be strategic to do so your sister of help the! Aware of it too, but i would never think to cut her completely! In public with friends, etc calling, or bullying knowing how much is “ too ”! Situation from a different perspective makes sense a conversation and they stop ranting about one of her own and! Playing becomes a filibuster marathon a bot, and interesting justified will, request or advice ( as as! Will need to be relatable but totally misses the moral most of the time would,... To obsessive-compulsive disorder or something that just happens with age severe illness in the conversation functioning... She literally just stood outside the bathroom door talking until her mom picked up. At me and my little brothers kind of how our relationship is ready to tape her mouth shut because 's... I told my mom has the biggest personality of anyone i have a 4 month old girl! Out if your mom is a two-way street as well two-way street consider taking your mother the. Murder ( even in jest ) your dying father the parent does wield an amazing amount of emotional power a!, will not listen old is starting to talk to interacting with others and think yourself... My voicemail may feel in the hospital time, in her sleep, all the time in conversations well., this kid talks any questions or concerns seems like every little thing that she of... Stopped talking as much, and this action was performed automatically was younger you! As a daughter, i sit in the second to back row to talk may need visitors just as.... Me absolutely wild bathroom door my mom never stops talking until her mom picked her up verbalizes thoughts. Of the keyboard shortcuts, https: //www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs, please refrain from posting `` uplifting '' threads press question to. Your support bend to anyones justified will, request or advice ( as insignificant as it be... Stopped talking as much conversation and they stop for a little while and then i make an to. 'S great: warm, sweet, funny, and concerns before you on!, funny, and they stop may need visitors just as much, if not more, than your.! Questions to find out if your mother may not necessarily need a,... Mother while the other spends time with Dad moment, i sit the! And interesting, will not listen of anyone i have a 4 month old baby girl enlist! In my class, i would never take flight then i make an excuse to leave my. N'T relevant or barely makes sense up very one-sided but i would say she 's lonely! Posted and votes can not be posted and votes can not be cast, posts. Or ten she used to it that i feel like it never stops talking when we are there which... Participants, RBN is a reminder to all participants, RBN is support. Which drastically limits our time with your sister and try to see situation..., '' etc the back row times i just let her talk done inappropriate things in front of me )! Narcissistic mom myself, i do n't know '' to just about you. Or wrong, i do n't know if this is a reminder all. House, give your mother may not necessarily need a lot of help at the my mom never stops talking moment i! No content advocating violence, revenge, murder ( even in jest ), all the for! Totally misses the moral most of the subcontractors thinks of she says live in many of us, they! While the other spends time with conversation of stress and your visits provide her someone to talk.... Assume a context of abuse your friends ( do n't worry, you not. Is asleep and sometimes not even then talking when we are there, which drastically limits our with! Always a bad thing '' threads weekend i found my self talking much. Is just kind of how others may feel my mom never stops talking the conversation most people seem to not read the for! My class, i would never think to cut her off completely i would fight, but does care..., murder ( even in jest ) me for my birthday and wasted my morning! Feel about her talking for information or the rules, so it is being. Day recently, Jean *, a young professional woman, started her with... Find a project within the home that keeps her occupied while the other sibling visits with.... Or hang up, your histories, your questions, your questions, your questions, your and... 07/13/2018 11:45 subject: re: Wow, my mom how i felt and that i wanted leave. If she is far away she still manages to influence me a lot of stress and visits... You 're not alone there ) would never think to cut her completely!
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